The Humpty Dumpty Syndrome: Putting Yourself Together After the Great Fall?
How many times have you heard someone say, “Losing my job was the best thing that ever happened to me!” Does hearing this sentiment make you scratch your head in puzzlement? How could something so negative be so positive? What’s the person’s secret?
Few of us begin our careers with the intent of doing something else. After all, we’ve invested quite a bit in getting to where we are. Much like Humpty Dumpty, we proudly sit atop our wall of achievements and accomplishments giving little thought to doing anything else. However, with today’s winds of change, it’s pretty likely that sometime in our working lives we will find ourselves tumbling from our safe perch. For most of us the great fall occurs when:
- Our job is eliminated through downsizing.
- Our company is acquired or merges with another company and the new situation no longer appeals to us.
- Our job stays the same but we just can’t get excited about it anymore.
So, after the great fall what are the secrets to putting yourself back together again – better than ever?
Secret 1: Accept that you must let go of things from the past. By its very definition, change begins with an ending. Acknowledge the loss and your feelings associated with it. Realize that it is perfectly normal to feel sadness and some confusion or chaos. Seek support from friends, family members, a therapist or a personal coach. Work through these feelings. Don’t deny or ignore them.
Secret 2: Take a close look at your previous endeavors. Consider each of your past jobs a “test drive”. What are the lessons that can be learned? What aspects did you enjoy? What things did you tolerate? What made your blood boil? What energized you? What were you most proud of accomplishing? Do you see any common threads appearing?
Secret 3: Get to know yourself really well. It’s the best investment you can make in your future. Identify your skills. Listen to your desires. Write a list of your needs and wants. Look at the labels you’ve given yourself. Embrace your values and special gifts. Celebrate your passions. Liberate yourself from the beliefs you drag around like a ball and chain. While it may sound simple, this step can be quite daunting. As the familiar saying goes, “It’s difficult to see the picture when you’re inside the frame.” You can jumpstart this discovery process by partnering with someone who is objective, honest and dedicated to your success – such as a personal coach or a career counselor. Working with a partner dramatically expands your perspective and keeps you anchored as you explore uncharted waters.
Secret 4: Create a destination with soul. Just as change begins with an ending, change ends with a new beginning. Set your sights on a place where your head lines up with your heart. A place built upon the solid foundation of your values, special skills and unique gifts. Use your magic wand and paint the perfect setting for your future. What features from your previous “test drives” do you want to include? How can you best honor your values and share your gifts? Where do you want to be in five years? How do you want to be spending your time? What does your home look like? Who is in your life? How do you feel? Give yourself permission to write down your dreams. Don’t skimp on the details. They are often the keys to unlocking joy.
Secret 5: Enjoy the journey. Now that you know who you really are and where you want to go, the next step is getting there. To make sure your trip is effortless, do some strategic planning before you start out. When’s the best time to begin? Does it make sense to break the journey down into small pieces? What obstacles do you anticipate encountering? What’s your plan for navigating around these obstacles? What type of resources do you need? What’s a realistic and energizing timeline? How will you gauge your progress? As you head down the road, remember to look around. You don’t want to be so focused on your plan that you miss out on wonderful and unexpected opportunities along the way.
Energy. Passion. Happiness. Balance. Peace. Joy. All the King’s horses and all of the King’s men couldn’t put Humpty Dumpty back together again… but why wait for them now that you know the secrets? To hell with the King’s horses and with all of his men, today is a great time to live the life of your dreams!
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